Trapped In Our Social Closets We All Are!

Unfortunately, far too many of us humans live out our entire lives in the social closets of our upbringing, never showing the world who we really are – our uniqueness as individuals based on our natural leanings. This is sad. I, too, am a living victim of this social programming, that is designed specifically to create an “acceptable order” to the social world we humans daily engage in. All my life I have been a rebel inside, defying so much of what I was raised to believe is “right” looks, behaviors, and beliefs. But, all my life I have failed to express this rebellion in a socially meaningful way, and in a way that boosts my own self-autonomy and self-esteem. The social indoctrination of my youth was that informative and impactful upon me – yes, that strong – that I learned to hide myself from most, and reveal the fuller me only in aberrant ways that have never really brought social satisfaction into my life.

I no longer want to live life this way! For the rest of my life, I want to live differently – freely – among those who wish to revel in and participate (even if it is simply as “witness” or as “encourager”) in my self-expression of who I am, what I am, and how I feel inside about “me” and about this “shared” life we experience together. This web site, as it presently is now structured, is meant to begin this process of self-revelation – of an effort to be truly authentic with myself and with others within this world that we live. This specific page is but another step of sharing in this process – an even deeper “revealing” shared with you in the hopes that it will encourage you to interact with me and encourage me to live my life out in the open from now on! That you, by your interaction with me, are encouraging me to step out of the closet fully and completely, and be authentically me in your presence – and before the world itself.

I hope you will embrace my offer to relate in this much more intimate way, and that we can help each other to live and be more authentic around each other! Now, to the purpose of this page, and what it is that I down deep “want” and “need” to share with you, my friends. I pray reverently and truly that you find what I share here a blessing to your mind and to your life! And, I hope and pray that you choose to personally interact with me about what I’ve shared here, and about what needs to happen, now that I’ve done so! I just want to fully and truly be me for a change, unabashedly and unashamedly publicly me for a change! Before anymore of this life passes me by! Please, I supplicate with my lips and my fingers, help me to now be and make me be truly me and out of the closet! … Now, to the subject items of this page!


There are very few human made objects in this world that actually catch my attention. This is probably why advertisements are a waste of time and money on me, more an annoyance than anything else! But, every now and then, I discover beautiful desirable things made by humans that fully catch my attention. That I deserve to have, to be ever adorned with. Here are a few of those human made objects that truly speak to me – deep inside me – that I want for the daily wearing on me.

(Hint, clothes of society are not one of them! And, they will never show up here on this page. Others can be as dressed as they want around me, and I will enjoy your cosmetic/fashion expression of beauty. But, I should be legally required to be naked of clothes at most times and in near all places, to never have the social opportunity to hide behind an image that is a “made up” me. Besides, clothes are fucking uncomfortable to me, sweaty and itchy. And, I do not believe I need them on me. See Here and Here, and you be the judge – seriously, let me know! I really hate clothes on me! But, before I become further off topic with this, getting now back on subject.)

For as long as I can remember, I have always had a challenge with keeping time. I have no natural sense of date and time, and my family can attest to this! Expect me to be on time, then I must be actively tracking time. Actively keeping an eye on the watch. It does not help that I do not wear a watch, now, does it? How I’ve been keeping time throughout these years is via cell phone apps and alarms. But, in all honesty, I do have a fascination with natural time. For I am aware of this – daytime, nighttime, new moon, full moon, etc. And, using man made time, I have always gone by the 24 hour clock – have never really understood the twelve hour clock, really. Too cumbersome for me to properly track time with. If I were to start wearing a watch upon my wrist, well, this wristwatch here on this page is the watch I would want to wear. It is elegant, but minimalist. It is a true 24 hour analogue quartz watch, that softly reminds with the shadowing of daytime and nighttime upon its face. Wearing this, I then could be held to accountability by those around me to be more cognizant of time, even though I lack a natural sense of it, yes?

Though I have no desire, taste for, or interest in wearing clothes,.. And, because I have been forced and still am being forced to wear clothes by the surrounding society I find myself within,.. I have longed for a compromise with society. Allow me to be freely and publicly naked more often and, in times when this is problematic, I promise to were this sarong for you (and however many more you desire) with whatever shirt you feel is best to go with this. I hate wearing pants! I’d much rather be wearing a man-skirt of some kind, whether it is a very light material-ed kilt or a sarong like on this page. This I can’t complain so much about, for I’m almost naked! It doesn’t take much to take this off me, and let me freely be, now, does it? I’ve longed to start wearing man-skirts for the longest time, but have never been bold enough to wear them as a clothing lifestyle choice. I do want that to change! … I’ve noticed, that you’ve might have picked up that I said as a clothing lifestyle ‘choice’, yes? Okay, I have an admission, I have worn a skirt or two, sometimes a kilt, in public – in defiant social rebellion to the social norm for men! But, this was when I was a young adult man, with no social responsibilities, and no reason to consider the social impact upon significant others around me for being dressed so, in such ways. If I may ask, have I been too fearful of social stigmatization regarding this?

Okay, now it is time to get much more personal, much more revealing about myself, than I’ve felt inside it is socially appropriate to be. But, I’m going to do it! Step even more out of the closet about me. I’m going to get very honest in an intimate and sexual way with you, now. Consider this a public opening up, here on this page, with this man made item above and the artistic ones below this. I have always, for as long as I can remember, had a longing to be owned, physically and behaviorally, in intimate/sexual ways. I have always been the natural hard-core bottom, looking for his blatantly determined and aggressive dominant – who loves to be entertained, serviced, and have fun! And, yet, who is also a loving “by means of discipline” unabashed top. I have been so mentally active throughout my life about this that I have gone for hours upon hours lost in sexual fantasies about all that she/he/they will do to me. Of course, this means that I’ve done a lot of self-masturbation in my days – trying my best to be erected hard all throughout the days and nights, while never having the orgasmic release that I so desire from this intense state of long-term arousal. Of course, I’ve cum on myself many a times, too, more than I’d like to say, because I don’t have someone in my life who can properly meet these intimate erotic needs of mine – someone who is truly sexually compatible with me – and prolonged fantasizing leads to eventual unavoidable orgasm.

I have never really been about shared sexually intimate encounters in the socially normal sense of what we’re supposed to be attracted towards. Hollywood romance is a foreign set of behaviors for me, literally. I do not experience sexual arousal towards others in this intimate body-lustful way. Rather, I am aroused sexually by “situational” social and sexual encounters – the “adult play” kind has always been my natural leaning, from puberty to present. Naturally, this creates a challenge in forming satisfying sexual intimacy with others for me, … unfortunately. I long to be aroused and sexually obedient and willing, but I don’t like to reach my own orgasm from this. Not, unless it is her/his/their desire that I experience an orgasm for her/him/them. This is how I have always been. So, when I became introduced to the human made “penis chastity cage” online, I immediately fell into aroused desire and love for the obvious sexual joy it can bring to me! No longer would I be able to touch and play with my dick, only the owner of my genitals who put this chastity cage on me can touch and play with them now. No longer would I be able to experience erections and/or orgasms at any given time of day or night and, especially, when I’m not in the “Keyholders” presence! No longer would I have any say over what I must do in order to experience the momentary freedom down below to enlarge and, then, release in ecstasy. I fucking need this penis chastity cage upon my penis and scrotum, for real!!! The Steelwerks Extreme Classic Supreme! And, I admit that I’ve already taken the measurements for it.

With this specialty key S-lock chastity cage upon my penis – being held in place by the round cockring and the square rectangle holding my scrotum in place and the urethral tube inside my penis keeping the cage assuredly on my flaccid dick – I’m screwed literally and figuratively for as long as she is hiding the key away and saying ‘no’ to getting it. How arousing is this?! Oh my, Goddess, fucking very! And, never in my life should I ever be allowed to lay a hand on this key – it belongs to my Keyholder only!!! Just typing the thought of this, as I’ve been doing here on this page, gets my abdomen and dick so tight and erected!!! Damn, just the thought of it! And, I refuse to touch it, now, to address these aching throbs … as much as I want to! Here and now, I must stay focused, eyes and fingers on the keyboard. I am just going to have to let it ache down there for now! And the only question in my mind is this: Just how many different asses do I have to kiss for this – for this well deserved chastity? Or, how many different ways and times do I have to kiss the same gorgeous ass for this? I really do want to know the answer to this question!!! In fact, I want to know so bad, that I’m willing to go all the way in baiting it happening – see here and here! I’ve got some ass kissing to do now!


I want the bisexual heart symbol seen in this photo tattooed on my buttock’s right cheek, and I want the “love Multiplied” with its three rings tattooed on my left chest pectoral (neither tattoos have to be large, just easily noticeable).

I want tattoos. Tattoos that physically out me. Permanent ink tattoos, colorful tattoos. Tattoos the reveal my intimate inner nature to the world! I want three tattoos. The three tattoos I’ve placed on this page, now inked into my skin, now a permanent part of my body. Inked for life! I know that by tradition, social upbringing, they are forbidden. I don’t care any longer, I want you to walk me into a tattoo shop and make me get the tattoos I’ve shared here. Give me no choice. In the very places I’ve shared that I want them! Make me live with my closet door wide open, on my chest and ass my truth reveal for a lifetime! And take advantage of my need for nudity, by making me show my tattoos to others – as you desire, and as you think they’ll appreciate.

I want “Spank Me” tattooed on my buttock’s left cheek, in the same exact size and place as it is on this woman’s derrière in the photo. I really deserve it! And, I deserve it to be a regular open invitation for another(s) to follow through with this, ensuring both my cheeks are reddened intensely all over!

I long to be spanked. Seriously spanked! By a lover who knows how to be painfully merciless in her/his physical discipline of me. To be laid over your lap, my head and hands to the ground to your left, my bare vulnerable quivering buttocks before you on your lap, my feet reaching down to the floor to your right. I long to be spanked so well that I am literally brought to sobbing tears upon you. Or, before you, if I’m not on your lap. I’m serious! Like all my intimate thoughts, I’ve been thinking of these situational sexual play behaviors between us all my adult sexually-aware life. I wouldn’t be sharing these thoughts now here, if I were not entirely serious that I want to experience each and every one of them! And, then more – whatever is on your mind for me, for us, too! … Now, don’t get me started on how much I do wonder what the feel of ropes upon my forearms, while my arms are held together behind the small of my back, feel like – and how much I enjoy being truly bound and unable to escape, while she decides what all to do with me during this time!


From the time I was in my very early teens, I knew that I was different. Yes, sexually different in orientation. I have always been attracted to women, but have always longed for their, often collective, sexual dominion of me. I have always longed to be a woman’s physical property and sexual slave, to do with as and how ever she so desires, where and when ever. As well, I have always been sexually attracted to men, and have longed to be knelt in submission before his male sex, openly receptive above and behind to his growing interest in me.

I cannot avoid the truth of my bisexual nature, and I would be truly dishonest towards myself and towards others if I did not admit to this! With my wife, I have always been up front. But, by the nature of how our relationship has unfolded, I have yet to experience the bi-some intimate marriage relationship, between him and her and I, that I’ve always dreamed of achieving in life. Unfortunately for me, I’ve always been a bit socially inept and introverted about this need, because of the self-doubt of indoctrination in youth and in life, and this has been my stumbling block in being a bold achiever – as I hear that some polyamorous and open relationship ?couples? are with what they’ve achieved!

But, now, I must refocus and get back to the fuller purpose of this page. It, yes, is about outing myself – and I believe that I have successfully done this already. You know much more about me, now, than I ever really intended for this “index” node of my web site! But, what is written is written, and I must and will live with the consequences of this. I refuse to go back hiding in the closet of my life ever again! Love or hate me, ignore me or use me, because of this information here – I care, but will let you decide, now having seen and read.

What are your thoughts and intentions, now that you know? I accept that I am about to find out, and I am at peace knowing that I have finally outed myself – as I should have done many long years ago. But, insecurities will do this to you, clam you up from open self-expression before others, in fear of the possible consequences that could come from this. I don’t want to live in my self-made closet any further. So, here you go, some of the man made items that I am actually attracted to and would love to be wearing – not for me, but for the enjoyment it gives others for me to do so!

It is my deepest hope, now that I’ve gotten this expressed out of me and onto this page, that I can now just let go – mentally let go of all of this – and trust life and allow life to unfold in the ways that will address these deeper sides of me – so that I can spend more time obsessed with the every day things of life, and less time inwardly obsessed with these very specific aspects of me. If I’m meant to be blessed with the wearing of these man made items, then she/he/they will insist upon it, that I follow through with my words, as I’ve shared them here – and as she/he/they have added to them.

I’m leaving the closet door open from now on, and we’ll see what happens! I’d love to be very much surprised, again and again! And, then, have to follow through with all I’ve shared here with you – for I am an honest man!

!!! UPDATE !!!

I have more to share with you! Do you wish to read it? Below what I am now sharing in this page update is a link to a special page, wherein I share my opening up to you, my Wife, about my need to worship you and serve you – as the Goddess that you are in my life. The link is at the bottom of this page, and the access password is “abc123”. It couldn’t be easier, yes? Because I love you and want to be fully open with you, and the world around me! Now, to this update:

I am Joseph Tsefanyahu Farkasdi. And I have nothing to hide from you! Because on these two pages I am revealing all, then I have some admissions to make.

One, I am a natural born nudist that is trapped in society’s demand for clothing. I’d much rather be naked all the time and in front of everyone. Though I only know what everyone around me looks like in their clothing, everyone around me should have the knowledge of what I look like fully naked. This is only fair, deny my eyes until I’ve earned the sight of your natural beauty, but never grant me the luxury of such personal privacy!

Two, I am a natural born sexual “bottom” looking to be disciplined and trained by a loving aggressive “Top”. The dominant woman (or woman and man) that won’t hesitate to take full advantage of my sexual and behavioral submissiveness all for your entertainment and pleasures. I deserve, so I’ve always felt inside, to be physically and behaviorally “owned” if you will – (in body) especially my mouth, ass, penis and scrotum, and the semen inside that is yours for whatever you want to do with it(!) and (in mind) full submission to wanting to do and allow to be done whatever you so desire – and to have to fully accept this my status in life before you and your friends, and be legally sworn to this.

Three, I am a natural born masturbator, who is always playing with his penis and scrotum, ass and inner thighs, lips and nipples, when no one is presently around (or all are sound asleep!). I am so sensitive in these places, and I have a matching overactive ever sexually fantasizing libido. My sex brain is a constant distraction in my life, ever taunting me with arousing scenarios and images of my deserving submission in life! I fantasy about my wife, about her friends, about my friends, about my imaginary women and men friends all the time. Which means that I masturbate a lot, in secret, in private! But, I’m a natural born masturbator who wants to be denied his erections by his significant other, to be physically denied his ability to play with himself when alone!

Four, I’m a natural born bisexual, too, who is just as attracted to penis as I am to dominate and demanding pussy!. I have always sexually felt that I should have to serve others intimately and selflessly in my uniquely desirous ways. All the while finding myself being physical kept in penis chastity and erection/orgasm denial by my lovers/life-partners. They should have full control over my own need to erect often and to eventually orgasm, and I should have no say any further! And She/He/They should be the only ones to decide when I’ve “earned” this brief freedom to be erected before them, so they can then decide what they want me to do about it!

The amount of pre-cum that is dripping from my penis right now, over just admitting openly and shamelessly to *all* of this, is arousingly uncomfortable within these clothes I’m presently wearing! If only someone would share and talk to my Wife about these admissions! If only my Wife wear of the nature to know how to aggressively act upon these truths, and have the inner desire to hold me accountable to them and make me live them, for Her pleasures! Okay,… my truthful and honest admissions are made, and I will live with the consequences of having shared them!


Right here in This Photo, taken from the Steelwerks Twitter feed, really shows what this chastity cage will look like on someone like … me! Wow, I so deserve this being done to me! Just with the version shown above (the above, with its more open design, allows me to do personal hygeine without Her having to unlock and remove the device for this every single time – only when the urethral tube needs cleaning, when it is required that it be inside my penis)!

Because, I do thorough homework on these devices, yes, I am aware that The Classic Extreme does indeed cost a pretty numerous number of pennies. It’s an investment, which I must wear for Her the rest of my life, if she actually surprises me with making such an investment! Or, if someone who knows Her and has deep pockets and wants to gift this to Her for my wearing for Her pleasure, and does so … I am unable to refuse and am already sworn to wearing it, for Her and this other, for a lifetime (save for those brief moments that She gives me freedom to erect!).

In the event this happens, the sizing chart measurements are as follows (yes, I’ve already measured and am aware that there are “no returns” once it’s made – and, with a fully committed to this smile, I will live with any errors in measurement that I’ve made, if there be any – which I believe is a not!):

A – inner diameter, 4.25 cm (roughly equivalent to 1 3/4″), width (up-down the length of penis), 2 cm (roughly equivalent to 3/4″)
B – inner width, 1.5 cm (roughly equivalent to 5/8″), inner length, 6.5 cm (roughly equivalent to 2 5/8″)
C – height (up-down the length of scrotum), 1.5 cm (roughly equivalent to 5/8″)
D – curving length, 10 cm (roughly equivalent to 4″), inner diameter of cage, 3.5 cm (rougly equivalent to 1 3/8″)
E – curving length, 6.5 cm (roughly equivalent to 2 5/8″) [10 cm D – 1.5 cm G – 2 cm A = 6.5 cm E]
F – inner diameter, 0.25 cm (roughly equivalent to 1/8″), curving length, 6.25 cm (roughly equivalent to 2 1/2″) or “to end of cage” like in the diagram
G – width of space, 1.5 cm (roughly equivalent to 5/8″)

Here it is online:

I really think the bigger challenge will be getting this male chastity cage on my penis without me having penis arousal occuring, because it’s actually happening to me!

Now, if a MORE AFFORDABLE option is desired for the time being, HERE IT IS! You don’t have to wait to put me in my place and lock me to your humbled and devoted service!!!

Should this be of interest, and She wants to begin early in locking me down in service to Her, there is always these cheaper versions that She could get and use for the meantime.

(Basically, if it has a PA piercing rod built into it, then it is as inescapable and unavoidable as the one above – even if it just covers the penis shaft and head alone. Instead of specialty screws, a specialty key for the built-in lock. Out of all the cheaper in price versions, this Evotion one shown here speaks the most to me – AND – I’d so deserve it if You should choose to buy it for me and make me wear it for You! Since, I advertised it, here! Take me to a piercing shop and have them put a Prince Albert piercing through the head of my penis, slip this chastity cage with PA rod onto me, and hide away those keys where I’ll never find them! Guaranteed this chastity cage for the penis WON’T be slipping off (opps!) late at night while you’re asleep this way! And, it doesn’t interfere with the wearing of the 1″ wide “wedding band” cockring You already have around my genitals for a lifetime!)

Like with the Classic Supreme above, should She surprise me with one of these (actually buy it for me!), then I am submitted already, now, and must allow Her to put this on me, and face the consequences for sharing on this here! … What are the AFFORDABLE ones I write of? It’d be like the one that we’ve actually talked to each other about before (a CB type, but She never acted on it!), and this one linked below is even better – check it out!:

Evotion Cage Bijou – Custom-Made to Your Measurements – from $219.00 –

I wouldn’t be fairly putting the fate of my penis in Her hands, if I didn’t show my due diligence and provide the measurements needed for their sizing chart, now would I? So, here they are (I am unashamed, even when flaccid!):

My measurements:
SL = 44.45 mm (@ 1 3/4″) (shaft length)
GL = 28.50 mm (@ 1 1/8″) (glan length)
SD = 31.75 mm (@ 1 1/4″) (shaft diameter)
PAD = 25.00 mm (@ 1″) (prince albert depth)
PAP = 8 ga (prince albert thickness)

If She so desires, She can now buy this for me without even telling me that She’s doing so! If this happens, I’m committed to all that results from its wearing. And, the BONUS for Her is that I must wear this Prince Albert encasing chastity device WITH – yes, I said “WITH” – the 1″ wedding band already on me! No escaping a sworn promise, now! Right, my wife?


My Wife, my Goddess, I want to give you everything you’ve ever asked for. Seriously! But, you have to understand that, for reasons I don’t fully understand about me, situation is everything to me. Especially, if you expect me to be motivated to get out of my shell, and be self-initializing. Put me in the position where I have to act – and act often – and reticence can no longer hinder.

Don’t be afraid to hold me accountable to these words, remind me of my place, and insist that I fulfill them – my promised words. You know how I like being a pleasing man, even if there is no personal reward in it for me. But, I admit that I need the motivation, too. What better way to motivate me than to give me your key-controlled denial of my own ability to self-pleasure?

Your pleasure comes first, before mine, this I understand. This is a duh, a no brainer! As much as I understand this, though, I admittedly am prone to living life as if it were in my head. I’m sure that you feel, at times, as if you’re a mother to your children and to me. Am I correct? As you know, I’m also very observant (even when I don’t share it).

If I’m right about this, then I need to be adorned with a penis chastity cage, plain and simple! No ifs or buts, it needs to happen! For this shows that I clearly need some motivating discipline to be more proactively attentive to your needs. Both household and personal intimate needs! I need to start earning my erections for you!

And a little self-denial (erection denial), with an occasional serious smack on the ass (a well deserved buttocks-reddening tear-invoking spanking), may just be that motivation I need. That is, if you’re willing to motivate me these ways – for your benefit, of course. On behalf of all males like me in this world, I apologize for this (that I would dare ask for this aggressiveness in a woman)!

The point is that you should never have to feel like you’re taking care of your man, when he should be taking care of you. Is this correct? And, I’m obviously cognizant of this, am willing, and am asking to be physically trained to meet this. I apologize so immensely that I have not!

I won’t leave you, if you make me live disciplined this way and in self-denial (until you choose to bless me with the momentary sight of the key, for I did ask for it!). I might even learn to habitualize meeting your womanly needs, properly now and on a regular basis (just so that I see the key more often, now that you’re always super happy and willing to look for it!).

Some of us just need a little encouragement in life by others, for our own sake! We respond better to this, than to what we inwardly know that we should do. This is just our nature. We need to earn our deserved position and status in life. Shouldn’t my status be to worship you for your very presence, not just for all that you do for me and for our family?

This is a serious question, and I’ll leave it for you to answer. I don’t deserve you, and I know this. But, because you are my living Goddess in this life, I want to deserve you. I want to deserve my status and position in life, and not just because you’re married to me – but because I have been truly EARNING it. What do you have to say (by your words and actions)?


If it is to ever happen to me, then I want to be surprised by it. To experience the sinking knowing feeling that I am now committed to wearing this penis chastity cage for Her, with no way out from having to now EARN my erections – one erection at a time! For Her pleasure, having to meet Her detailed and specific household and intimate/sexual obligations for me, just to even be teased by the sight of that key of momentary penis release! And, to not experience Her actually using that key on this chastity cage, to release my penis for a brief well earned erection, UNTIL She is completely satisfied that I have truly EARNED it for Her.

(The only exception, is Her briefly uncaging me for 1,2, or 3 minutes – her choice – so that I can properly and quickly wash the penis cage and my penis in Her presence, before She deservingly cages it once more!) Oh my Goddess! Why does this stir sensitivity in my loins below, the very thought of it? If it is not that this is the way it should be for me! And is the reason for why my mind gravitates back to this again and again, and to my sensitive awareness that I have a penis so vulnerable to Her desires and disciplined denials down there!

You have no idea how much I long (and for how long I’ve longed) to have my penis caged in a way that I cannot escape, where I myself never have the key to my release, and where I must rely upon your feeling gracious today to allow me a few hours (or a overnight, if I’ve been especially well deserving) of genital freedom from the always present restrictive reminder of my place and your authority in my life. If need be, put a lockable Prince Albert piercing through my penis for good measure, to ensure that I can never slip out and self-pleasure – to ensure my penis erection denial, until I have really earned a moment’s freedom before you! … I wouldn’t write so much about this and other submission things, if I were seriously desirous deep inside for the actual living and experiencing of it, as a lifestyle choice between us.

You have no idea how much my ass (yes, my vulnerable white tight obstinate and uncompromising ass!) longs to be spanked like this from time to time! To put me back into my subservient place. To remind me who is really the Boss here! Especially, when you feel that I deserve it, or need a reminding motivation. When you do feel this way, insist that I submit myself willingly to it! On your lap, or over a sofa/bed like in the spanking photo above. I will and must submit myself to this, release the tears, and acknowledge the lesson I am learning through this painful deserving reddening of my ass! … Wouldn’t a permanent pretty tattoo with the words “Spank Me when I deserve it!” go nicely on that upper left buttocks? I’ve always wanted a tattoo like this, inviting the actually doing of it. I think I’ve earned this, too!

And, to these last two paragraphs, because of their absolute truth, I put my full legal name, here, to them – Joseph Tsefanyahu Farkasdi


It does not matter how much I may want to be surprised with a chastity cage now actually before me, being put onto my penis with the promise that I will never ever be allowed to have my hand on the key, because it must be Her decision. It must be put on me, so that I must earn each erection that She allows me to have, because She desires that I wear this male chastity cage for Her and earn my erections from now on.

It doesn’t matter how much I want to be in that surreal state of uncomfortable but fully inwardly aroused over the reality that this is now actually happening to me, there’s no avoiding it, and I am now fully committed to this willingly offered submission to Her. This is a lifestyle choice, and it must be Her choice that I am to be always adorned this way for Her, because She enjoys having me this way and responding to it.

This is why I stopped commenting on my post to Her, showing my enthusiastic interest in wearing a male chastity cage for Her, where She alone has possession of the key. Because, I don’t want to be too overly enthusiastic that She buys it and puts it on me, because I keep talking about it to Her.

But, yes, I want Her to decide for Herself that She is actually going to buy this male chastity cage and make me wear it for Her – for real, at all times, as if it were a temporarily removable part of my body – because She wants me to live with it, earn every one of my erections before Her, and show Her, with my behaviors and attitude, how enthusiastic and thankful I am to Her for actually doing this and committing me to it!

If it is only me enjoying this erection denial, then it is not worth actually experiencing it. I want Her to decide this needs to happen, and then enjoy the rewards of denying me my erections. Until I am worthy of having one, regardless how many days/weeks/(even)months this may take, and to give me my hour/evening of penis freedom only when She alone decides that I’ve truly earned it, to Her satisfaction!

A Page Now For My Wife


One last thought, before I touch not the contents of this page ever again!:

Besides these two intimate lifestyle behaviors involving chastity and a paddle (and maybe the She-approved tattoos and piercings), in everyway else, we are seen as the normal couple next door. But, in what She did to my penis with a chastity cage and does occasionally to my ass with a well deserved and earned spanking, and in what all I do to show Her my love and reverence, while I earn each erection that She allows my penis to have (that She allows *me* to have) – now, in these more intimate and semi-private ways we are different from the norm.

Assume nothing by this photo alone. Read the words written here on this page!

Unless She parades me down the hallways of a public shopping center, neck collared and leashed like Her favorite pet dog, with my forearms tied together behind my back and me fully naked (adorned only with the penis cage), – a lifelong private fantasy of mine – then you would not readily know our differences from the norm when meeting us publicly. We’re so typically socially normal on the surface around each other, except for the occasional public crotch or ass grab (a subtle reminder who owns, and who is owned) when She feels it needed, you wouldn’t know the extent this Dom-sub play is intertwined into our everyday life!

At least, this is how I’ve been visualizing intimacy and relationship between my Wife and I (or, between my Wife, Husband, and I) all my life! The question is, “Have I earned living this fantasy life out for real in this real life between us?” Two decades have already slipped by! It takes two (or three), at the very minimum, to play and have deep fun together, yes? Else wise, it’s just I making futile attempts to pleasure myself on self-acted out fantasy and fetish behaviors. It’s just not the same! I prefer and hope for loving but aggressively demanding play partners – who on Her/Their own want to relate with me in these behavioral and sexual ways!

11 thoughts on “Trapped In Our Social Closets We All Are!”

  1. I have another important admission to make on this page, here in this comment. If there is one thing that I have learned from years, now, of having a one-inch wide “wedding band” cockring always* on the base of my genitals, it is this: “I love the feeling of metal grabbing a solid hold down there, shaping and keeping my genitals firmly in place! It is exquisite feeling! All males deserve such an adornment, and especially this male – me!” – JTF, born for this!

    * – For truth and honesty, though, I must admit as well that if I can, if I’m given the freedom to do so, as I so desire at any given moment, then I will and *I have* repeatedly removed this genital band from its rightful place on my genitals for various long periods of time. Yes, I’ve been repeatedly breaking my sworn promise to wear this genital ring at all times for her – to never take it off myself, without her explicit consent. I do have a maybe valid reason! The reason for this is: 1) because I can take it off myself, without any struggle or effort at all and 2) because, if it feels like I’m the only one actually holding me to this sworn promise, then I’m given to the temptation in these moments to do so and take it off. It’s just too easy to take this genital band off, because I’m still actually in control down there! At all times!

    I know. Whether intentionally disobedient and unfaithful to my sworn promise or not, I am still guilty, guilty, guilty, and deserving multiple punishments at this point. But, put this male chastity cage I showed to you above on me, now, – and forever hide away the key from the touch of my fingers – and I’ll truly know what it means to keep my sworn promise to be always wearing this “wedding tackle”, this “love adornment”, this “commitment cage” upon me. The way I want down deep to know that my promise is kept! All in devotion to you, my love, my wife, and my friend – truly and solely “chastised” down their at all times for your pleasure!

    I need to earn my freedom and right to an erection! Accepting that at all other times I am unrelentingly held in place by your adornment for me, an adornment that I do not in any way control. I need to know that I can only now experience the erection of my arousal – as and when you so desire – when in your presence, after I’ve sufficiently shown the kind of domestic, romantic, and sexual behaviors towards you that are bringing you intense pleasure and arousal for me! How many chores, words, and touches upon your body – with the rest of me – must I do to win a momentary sight of that key? I so want to find out, again and again and again, repeatedly! And, if I’m behaving exceptionally well, maybe you’ll show others why I’m so good at satisfying your needs.


    A sexual fantasy that is often in my head, now – *it summarizes beautifully in a single real-to-life scenario what this page that I’ve written here is really all about!*:

    Now with this male chastity cage firmly attached, encapsulating my penis and scrotum in its solid unrelenting metallic hold, and the key truly hidden away, She hands me a sheet of paper and says, “If you want to have an erection again, then you better faithfully fulfill every instruction on this page. Consider it your Bible! Your path to seeing me bring out that key, and giving your penis brief momentary salvations! Do you understand me, Joseph? I’m going to be very strict and demanding about this, without saying one more word about it. You either do and do well, and earn your right to having an erection – before me, of course. Or you don’t do well and piss me off, and I keep saying ‘no’ to finding that key for you. It’s fully your choice. But, the fate of your penis hinges on how satisfied I am with your daily performance.” And, I respond, humbly kneeling before Her, “Yes, Ma’am. Yes, my Goddess! I will do as you say! Or face the punishment. And I deserve what I get.” She smiles and, then, tells me to go, to get on with it.

    I walk out of our bedroom, put on my reading glasses, and read the words She’s personally written onto this sheet of paper now in my hands. Upon it is a list of daily and weekly chores that I am expected to always “have already done” for Her.* If She has to do it Herself at any time, then I have failed to complete and don’t deserve to see the key appearing in Her hand any time soon. Just reading this, I have to admit to myself inwardly that “She has a point, and I deserve this motivating chastity upon me!” And, below this, is a list of intimate romantic and sexual activities that She expects me to actively, on my own innitiative and without asking, “just do” for Her often. If She’s not feeling emotionally and physically aroused and/or cum-ing regularly, then I have failed to satisfy enough to earn a taste of my own orgasmic penile freedom. I will have to try harder and do better! Or, if She’s tired, I get memory points for at least have attempted to initiate physical intimacy with Her, before She says to me “not at this time”.

    Either way, the consequence of living under metal chastity for Her and being actively engaged by necessity in showing Her how much I appreciate and worship Her on a daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly basis – how well I fulfill this Biblical writ between us – while being denied my own needy pleasures, makes this worship of Her all that much more appealing and desirable! How well I please my living human Goddess, truly determines just how often I get the momentary pleasure of Her deciding to take this male chastity cage off my penis for a moment, so that I can experience once again for a loving brief moment My very own full-on hard-on erection! Either way for Her, whether She is denying me or allowing me my own freedom, She is getting pleasured and served as She so desires and so deserves – which is all that really matters in the first place! An unending life fate for me, all for Her pleasure, and so deserving for a man like me!!!

    Right here, I swear to you, this is what this is all about for me! The driving libido and eroticism within me for this! To be living life like this – FOCUSED always on a set of objectives purposefully designed to SERVE Her that, in a way, ALSO addresses my life-long erotic needs for SUBMISSION that so distract me SO MUCH of the time (and spurs my present household laziness)! May I have to work my ass off for Her! May I find myself deservingly punished again and again, until I get it down and right every time! May my balls ache with need to feel my penis momentarily freed, so I can now freely swell before Her, because I have worked hard enough for Her to EARN this brief orgasmic freedom for myself! And, then, when I’ve gotten too good at living by Her household Biblical writ for me, to have to – on my own initiative – up the ante on what my penile freedom is now based upon. Assuming, that is, that She hasn’t already changed up or added to the present obligations that I must fulfill for Her, by handing me a new Biblical writ to live by. Either way, with the objective of Her man, Her lover, and Her friend being now actively engaged in special household projects, to be worthy of his erection and to be worthy of an orgasm! While still maintaining faithfully all my other chores and responsibilites that show my love, devotion, and worship of Her!

    Oh my Goddess!!! My balls are deeply aching in this very moment, as I type all of this, over the need to release! Make me live this – all of this above in the comment and on this entire page – so that I can earn the right to an orgasm before you, when you feel inclined to allow me, because I’ve genuinely earned it!!!

    1. *- As I study Her Biblical writ designed purposely to make me into a better man, I am in awe and briefly overwhelmed by just how much I must adapt.

      The list of household chores alone is long with details, extensively pointing out all the chores I already do myself, chores that we share in the doing, and all of the chores that She does – some of which I’ve never even thought to do, but now must learn how to do, and some of which requires me to maintain more normal up hours, if I am ever to faithfully complete. Damn. I find myself wondering, as I look upon this list, just how many times She will impulsively catch and do all the chores that I’ve missed, and how many demerit points I’ll deservingly get for this – of “Nope, you’re not seeing the key for that tonight! Do better!”. And, feeling motivated by this restrictive cage now unavoidably upon my penis, feeling inside now the need to prove to Her that I really can do better, given the time I need to improve myself!

      This isn’t going to be easy, I may even suffer a bit, but I’m a man and I’ll keep my obligations. For I did truly beg for this to happen, for Her to be aggressive in this way, and to put me through this – which I asked for! I don’t know why, but I do hope that She spanks the hell out of my butt with a leather paddle – everytime – I appear to be just plain slacking on this! I’ll even show Her a few scary leather paddles on Amazon for Her to consider (all the while hoping She’ll also occasionally use Her bare outstretched palms, when it’s only minor!).

      Then, I look upon the next half of Her Biblical writ for me, another extensive list, and I am aroused by some of what She wants me to do to sexually arouse and pleasure Her, and also nervous by some of the others for they will require me to stretch my own comfort zones. And, with all this tension of arousal now in my abdomen, I’m also noticing and knowing for real now the feel of not being able to erect. And this discipline of chastity hold me back down there is now my motivation to have all chores done and to have Her cum-ing regularly, lest I never see the key in Her hand that will grant me a moment of my own enlarged ecstasy! Better get fucking busy!!!

  2. As I lay here in bed touching myself, watching the clothed bodies moving about on the television screen and feeling my wandering hand find its way around my body – stroking my ticklish thighs and ass, flicking at my highly sensitive nipples, masturbating my achy scrotum and attentively erect penis – I can’t help but think about how I won’t be able to have an erection anymore someday soon. Hopefully, someday very soon! At least, not unless She says I can have an erection, and brings out the key that will release my penis from its long-term chastity. My hard throbbing penis now ignites ever so briefly at its head over this visualized thought, causing my abdomen to tighten in a momentary lurch. My hand backs off from it’s stroking, quickly, and I try to relax – trying not to think of the penis cage I hope to find embracing and encasing my soon to be again flaccid penis.

    I try not to think about how on the day She presents and puts this male chastity device on my penis and scrotum, no longer allowing me to have an erection at any time, except when She desires it, so long as it is on me, I am at this moment finally committed to my path of servitude to Her. To the woman I love and want to serve, and show my devotion in this highly restricted, vulnerable, denied way. I have played with my penis enough. I have had enough erections, especially the ones brought about by the touch of my hand, like tonight! I deserve to feel Her prevent me, by encasing “Her” penis in Her chosen chastity cage for me, thus denying me my right to penis arousal.

    To know for real, finally, that the only way I will experience an erection again is only when I’ve faithfully and properly earned the reward of this! No more night time erections, no more stroking my penis in the dark, while She’s sleeping beside me, like tonight. And, to know for real, by Her written and spoken words, that the standards for my occasional release – now that I am now unavoidably committed to this, and to Her – is to be high, hard, and demandingly difficult – so that I know for sure, when I am given momentary freedom to erect, that I’ve truly EARNED this right, through my hardworking loyal service and obedience to all She’s asked and demanded of me.

    I’m about to cum on myself, my dick is aching so hard now before me! Aching within the pressure of this one inch wide wedding band cockring She already has on me, embracing the base of my male sex! The only thing missing is Her erection preventing chastity cage, and Her extensive, intensely demanding written List of household and intimate chores that I must perform, faithfully to Her satisfaction and always on time! If She feels compelled even once to do a chore on that list, or feels that I missed an opportunity to meet Her sexual needs, then the key of freedom stays hidden this day or week, until I PROVE myself worthy, by better serving Her and Her needs!

    I so fucking deserve this happening for real in my life – that it no longer be an unfulfilled fantasy that tortures my mind while I play with my hard-on every night! That I know for real what I’ve been begging to get into, with every aroused fantasizing of this intimate living situation between us! And that, once caged, to learn – for real now – that there are no “take backs”, no “second thoughts”, and “no begging” for reconsideration or change to this arrangement, now that She’s purchased and placed on me this chastity device for Her and my own good! The decision is done and made, the penis cage is on my penis, it is now a lifetime commitment, and She will not entertain any plea from me to modify this arrangement, not now and not ever in the future!

    May She make it fully clear to me that She will throw away the key, before She ever agrees to modify for my benefit this now living arrangement between us!!! And, that for the rest of my entire life I will be kneeling down to kiss Her pussy for just the opportunity to see the key in Her hand, teasing me with the potential for my penis’s own momentary release, only to know after Her chastity cage for me is back on that it has disappeared again to wherever She hides it – a place so well hidden I never will find it!!!

    Oh my Goddess, my dick is so aching and throbbing hard right now, and I’m desperately trying not to cum!!! Been toying with this fantasy and my dick for a couple of hours now! I hope I can hold off, so as to not cum on me beside Her, so wrongfully while She is sleeping next to me! I need to lose my ability to masturbate, to have an erection without Her permission! The sooner this happens the better!!!

    I am posting this, and hoping and praying that someone reads it, shares it with Her, and She surprises me with Her serious lasting desire to make me actually live all these words for Her – for Her pleasure and easy life!!!

    1. I deserve to have to EARN my erection! To have to kneel and bare my ass for a spanking, too!

      With all the chores I have failed to do or failed to do in a timely manner, I deserve to have to always wear a penis cage, and EARN my erection at this point! I deserve a REAL LIFE spanking on my ass, too, every time it appears that I’m being half-assed about doing these chores! I’m fucking serious about both of these!

      With all the masturbating I have done over the years, late at night beside Her and during the day when She’s not home, I DESERVE to have to always wear a penis cage from now on, and start EARNING my erections! I deserve to be humbled and reminded by penis denial to have my focus ON HER, real life Her, where my attention should fully be always!

      Even when I’ve gotten better at this later on, and my home skills and bedroom skills have dramatically improved to Her smiling and happy favor, I deserve to have to EARN my erections from now on – always! And, I DESERVE a bold cursive-lettered “Spank Me” tattoo on my left ass cheek, as an invitation to train me well!

      Please, put a male chastity cage on my penis, my Wife! And, please, hide away the key – hide it always, where I will never find it! Please, spank my ass good and long with a leather paddle, my Wife, every time it appears that I am slacking off or being half-assed about my responsibilities to you! Doesn’t matter whether it’s household chores or whether it’s your intimate sexual needs, I need to be doing fucking better! So, motivate me in these two lifestyle ways, and don’t hold back or second guess my need for this, please, ever!

  3. This here is the nightly fantasy I find myself now masturbating to late at night…

    So, a brown package arrives in the mail today, with Her name on it. I put it by Her bed, as I often do. Not expecting or suspecting anything, in brief moment I have completely forgotten about it. … That is, until later in the evening, when She has opened it, calling me into the room with the contents hidden momentarily behind Her. I enter, and She tells me to close and lock the door. I have no clue what this is about! I lock the door behind me, walk up to Her, and place my hands together behind the small of my back.

    She is sitting on the edge of the bed, looking up at me. She tells me to “kneel down” before Her, and I do so, on both knees now, looking up at Her. She smiles, and I don’t know why. She puts the contents from the brown package on Her lap, and I involuntarily say, “Oh, my Goddess!”, looking at the pieces of a male chastity cage ready to be assembled together.

    She looks up from Her arranging, and says, “I bought this for you. What do you want me to do with it?”

    I respond to Her, “Oh, my Goddess, I want you to put it on me and, then hide away the key so we’ll that, no matter how hard I search, I can never find it!”

    She looks me in the eyes, and decides my seriousness about this, and says, “Stand up, and pull your pants down.” As I do so, standing and removing my pants and underwear, letting them drop to the floor below me, She says, “I don’t know how to attached these together, so you’ll have to explain how while I do it.”

    I acknowledge with a “Yes, Ma’am,” as I feel the underwear hit the floor around my ankles. I am standing now naked before Her, with my forearms side-by-side together behind my back, as if they were about to be bound together with rope.

    She picks up the chastity cage’s cockring with one hand, and touches my scrotum with the other, caressing them, as She brings the chastity cockring next to the one inch wide “wedding band” cockring that She already put on me years ago, now.

    She says to me, “I’m assuming this goes on first, yes?” I respond, “Yes Ma’am.” She touches the wedding band already there, and says, “This stays on. How do we put this chastity one on?” I doing my absolute best to not become aroused during any of this, willing myself to remain calm, so that She is able to put this penis cage on me, now, while at it. I verbally guide Her – slips each scrotum in first, then bend the my penis head under and in, and pull my penis through, till it is snug against the wedding band. She does it to me, oh my Goddess, actually fucking does it – I MUST remain calm!

    Now holding my flaccid penis up with one hand, She picks up the bio-resin made penis cage and wiggles it all the way on to my penis. Holding the two pieces now together, She grabs hold of the key and locks them in place together. She let’s go of my genitals and quietly studies this adornment arrangement for a moment.

    She reaches up and caresses my scrotum and this male chastity cage, and says, “I like it! … How does it feel?”

    I respond to Her, “It feels like it has always belonged there on me, my Goddess. Thank you, for doing this to me.”

    Says asks, “Are you sure, now? This may be a lifetime commitment here.” I say, “Yes, Ma’am, I am fully committed to wearing this for you, for your pleasure!”

    She lets Her hand drop to Her lap, and tells me to put my pants back on. I do so, underwear and, then, my jeans, and let Her physically inspect the chastised bulge She now sees hidden beneath my clothing.

    She says to me, “Okay. You better hope I don’t lose this key!”

    I respond to Her, “It is your key to do as you so desire with, my Love, just as my genitals are yours to do with as you so wish. Just never let me touch that key myself, ever, please! You can hide it away, lose it, sell it, mail it away or give it away to a distant friend, even throw it away if you wish. And, because it is your key, not mine, I must accept your decision on this! … Or, you can occasionally bring it out of hiding and tease me with the sight of it, telling me your thinking about releasing my penis from chastity for a moment. But, whether you tease me with the sight of this key or not, have I “earned” your use of this key to allow me a well deserved erection? If I have, then, you could also use this key on this, your chastity device for me.” I look down at the chastised bulge in my pants.

    I continue with, “Your chastity cage now, prevents me from having unpermitted erections and stops my wandering hand from masturbatory self-pleasuring. I am humbled by this, and ready to start earning my erections from now on! And, the only way for me to do this, now, is by keeping you pleasured and always satisfied! That is your key and you can do no wrong, I fully accept what you decide. Now, adorned and committed down there, how could I have any other choice?!”

    She says to me, “Alright. I’ve given you what you asked for. No chance to walk away from this now! So, time to face the consequences you brought upon yourself. If I’m not having fun with this, then you certainly will not be having your “moments” of fun! Do you understand me?”

    I respond to Her, “Yes, Ma’am, as it should be. I deserve this!”

    I continue, “This is to make me a better man, a more active, more focused, and attentive man. Please, I beg you, write down for me all the responsibilities you expect me to fulfill in this house and in private with you, always in a timely manner, and don’t hold back on this. My Queen, my Goddess, should never feel the need to have to do a chore for anyone in this house, for it’s your man in chastity that needs to be concerned about this!”

    I continue, “If you feel compelled to do a chore and it is not because you simply felt like doing it, but because it hasn’t been done, … then, no key for my penis’s release and a quite stinging and reddening, fully motivating, spanking on my buttock’s cheeks with a leather paddle is in order. You want me to grow, then I need situational motivation, both pleasurable and painful, to not be so easily distracted or lazy. Please, my Goddess, I want to serve, so don’t hesitate to motivate me!”

    She looks me in the eyes for a good long silent moment – deciding Her resolve, I assume, and mine – and then smiles and tells me to, “Go away now.” I say, “Yes, Ma’am” and I do so, wondering when I will see my written household obligations, and wondering what I can do now in the meantime to pleasure Her!

  4. I really hate fantasizing about this, these days! I only want to have to actually live it – for real, now – all of this!

    And, lo, I am still in the closet. For I would have hoped by now to hear someone say to me, “Okay, I’m buying this male chastity cage for you. And you’re going to wear it for me faithfully for the rest of your life! Only I can remove it – temporarily – from your penis, for a time, before putting it back on. Or whoever I hand the key to, provided your Mastress here does not mind this. You will never ever touch the key, and you will bow down and worship me whenever I tease you with the sight of this key! Do you understand me, Joseph?”

    In which case, I would become so excited for this! And say something like this, “For real? Okay, but please do not make this easy for me! I must earn the right to a moment’s release from this your chastity cage for me! And, if I’ve earned it, then only for the reason and time period you’ve decided. Then, it must go back on me! I should never again in my life know freedom without physical and penile servitude to you and all that you desire! And, especially no penis freedom from this chastity cage without truly earning it, if it’s for an erection of my own! I should only be worthy of having an erection again, only when I have begged and done whatever is necessary to deserve this!

    Getting to a ‘yes’ to be teased by the sight of the key first and, then, eventually to feel you actually remove this cage, in any situation, should never be easy for me! I must earn my desired/needed ‘yes, you can for a moment, and here are the conditions…’. My mind is truly fixiated on me wearing a chastity cage for Her, having to earn my erections from now on, and getting my ass thoroughly spanked till tears flow from my eyes when I not fulfilling my submitted place to satisfaction. …

    Sigh! No more fantasies about this! I want this to be my actual real life reality from now on!

    This is sexual me! Fill my mouth and my ass, have me swallow, make me feel taken and filled, humble my ass all over with strong bare hands or a leather paddle, tease my back, ass, inner thighs, crotch, and abdomen with soft stroking fingernails until I’m convulsing with muscular spasms, and torture my nipples and belly button with hard flicking fingers! This is what affects my body and makes me feel submitted. Bind my forearms together behind my back, inescapably for real, so that I feel even more vulnerable and willing to you.

    And only allow me to get hard and have an orgasm as an absolute last reward, for being such a good boy, only if you feel like I deserve this and are feeling generous enough to grant me this. Or, allowing me an erection and orgasm only when you use me or allow another to use me as a stud, an anonymous sperm donor. The semen produced in me is already “yours” for the taking and using, regardless. It never was “mine” in any sense of the word! Beyond this, sexually, my having an erection and reaching orgasm doesn’t matter – it is the last interest on my mind when relating intimately with you and your need for orgasms.

    Make me feel truly vulnerable and without any control over what’s happening! Dominant woman(s), man(s), and/or both. I should be naked at all times before when in servitude, unless the need or your choice requires differently, and I should be the target for all the entertainment and erotic pleasure on another’s/other’s mind(s). This is my sexuality in a nutshell, right here!

  5. Three reasons why your man should have to wear a strap-on dildo for you during intercourse:

    1) He’ll never reach a climax and lose his erection, ever! Especially, not before you are fully satisfied.
    2) He’ll never have an orgasm while inside you, which means you’ll never get pregnant again during intercourse!
    3) His focus will be completely and solely upon your body sensations and you reaching orgasm(s). He’ll get his rewards later!

    It’s not that I don’t want to use my penis for sex. It’s that I only want my penis used for sperm donation, it’s natural biological purpose. Besides, I don’t really need the use of my penis for sexual intercourse, especially when a strap-on on me would provide a lot more penetrating pleasure for her, than my penis can provide! Think about the amount of sexual pleasure I can give by mastering the art of tucking mine away, and using an ever ready and ever hard substitute down there. Allowing me the undivided attention and freedom to focus completely on her arousal and orgasms during sex! This is where my mind has always been at – the use of my mouth, fingers, and a well worn dildo down there all for Her unending and intense pleasure. Until she is satisfied!

    I’ll be sexually thankful to be just occasionally teased with the sight of the “key for momentary freedom” and, then if I’ve truly EARNED it, seeing my penis again briefly naked from it’s chastity cage. Free to experience a quick erection and orgasm, before being encased and denied once more for who knows how long! Only she knows, and this arouses me deeply and sexually to earning her interest in briefly granting this. House and Her needs first and always, before mine is even considered for acting upon!

    I deserve to have to EARN my erection! To have to kneel and bare my ass for a spanking, too!
    With all the chores I have failed to do or failed to do in a timely manner, I deserve to have to always wear a penis cage, and EARN my erection at this point! I deserve a REAL LIFE spanking on my ass, too, every time it appears that I’m being half-assed about doing these chores! I’m fucking serious about both of these!

    Lovehoney Unisex Strap-On Harness Briefs
    Unisex briefs with O-ring for strap-on sex and packing. Contrasting red seams adds a flirty feel. Soft and stretchy for comfortable all-day wear. Suitable for dildos with 1.5 inch O-ring diameters. Hand-washable.

  6. I am not these other people I see around me everyday. I do not need to compare myself to them, or their apparent way of life! I don’t have to be “normal”, as society is defining this. I’m not like everyone else. I am me! I need to be me! I need to fulfill my needs, and to live by my nature! While also fulfilling the needs of others, in the unique ways that I can. But, without denying me, who and what I really am, as I am. From now on, no more hiding!

    1. Whoever this is, I hope you’re serious. I dare you to share this page with my wife! Are you one of her understanding friends? (hopes nervously and humbly!)

  7. I have this recurring fantasy going, now that I’ve shared recently, once again, my willingness to let her put a chastity cage on my penis. Even through being “under the weather” and being unable to have an erection during that time from cedar induced sickness (I know, because I tried masturbating with no luck for four days straight, before finally it is up and hard!), these thoughts have returned again and again to my mind. Even when feeling like I just need to let her forget about that post, forget about the whole thing, these thoughts have returned again and again to my mind (because, I know she read it and commented on it, and there is still the possibility she might surprise me with liking this idea so much that she buys one for me!).

    I don’t know why I am so repeatedly drawn back to this forced upon me (once it is on me) chastity lifestyle, other than I’ve always needed a dominant woman that knows how to own me and make me work hard for her daily pleasure – all to just experience a rare moment of my own physical penis pleasure. A woman that doesn’t like the idea of me being able to masturbate my penis myself, and want to deny me this ability by physically denying me the freedom to touch my penis – and denying my penis the freedom to have an erection, until she decides that I’ve truly to her satisfaction earned one. Of course, only made possible when she decides to find that key she’s hid away, and momentarily release my penis from its well deserved chastity cage. Something of which I have absolutely no control over, should not have, and can only influence happening by doing all that she demands to her satisfaction for her to even consider it!

    But, back to the recurring fantasy presently occuring repeatedly in my mind… She and I are at dinner. We haven’t spoken about this post I shared with her since our last comments were placed onto it. To my surprise, during our dinner, she brings the subject up. “Do you still want that chastity cage, or was that just a passing fantasy of yours?” My response is to smile, while looking her in the eyes – being genuinely surprised by her question. “Yes, Ma’am. I was serious when I posted that post. So, ‘yes’, if you buy it, then I committed to wearing it for you. I have to!” She looks at me with a studying smile. With a bit of inwardly aroused attention, I ask her, “Have you already bought it?” “Still thinking about it,” she responds. A bit of relief goes through me, matched equally with a bit of real disappointment.

    “Why do you want to wear it?”, she asks. “I want to wear it, because you’ve decided that I’m going to wear it, have put it on me, and have now thrown away the key.” I catch my verbal slip! “Er, have hidden away the key!” She smiles at me, with a musing look that I can’t interpret. “What if I did put it on you, and then throw away the key?”, she asks me seriously. I almost giggle, surprised that she’s actually asked this question! “That is a fate I knowingly accepted as a possibility when I offered your putting a chastity cage on my penis, and never ever letting me have the key. … You could throw away the key one day, or lose it for real – not even telling me about it, at first, when it happened – and I would have to accept this as my destiny, my reality, for encouraging you to chastise my penis and deny me my erections.”

    A brief quiet pause ensues, before I break the contemplative silence. “You’re not thinking of throwing away the key, are you?”, I ask with a smile. “No. But, it is nice to know that I have the option and that you’d accept it, if I did.” I squirm in my seat a bit over this response, the realization hitting that she may actually be thinking of buying this chastity cage for me – or have already bought it! “I’m not worried that you would throw the key away. Even, if you were thoroughly pissed at me one day for some reason, I doubt that you would. But, if you did, I would accept it. I’d have to, with peace,” I respond. I am feeling the aroused sensation within my body about us actually having this conversation moment between us.

    She notices the slight squirming in my seat. I continue, “Besides, that’s what the paddle is for. To correct my behavior, when I’ve displeased you, with a solidly real spanking on my ass.” She smiles. “Something else that I seriously doubt that you have the ‘Dom’-ness to actually follow through on.” After a pause to eat a bite, she asks, “Why a Dom, why being owned and controlled? Is it just a sexual fetish, or seriously what you need?” I breathe in a deep breath, inwardly thinking – finally!, the question I’ve needed her to ask! “It’s never been just a sexual fetish with me. Yes, it’s a fetish lifestyle that attracts me sexually. But, it’s more than that! … I need to know what it is like to give you full sexual and behavioral control over body. To have to serve you and please you, or face the discipline consequences when you’re not fully satisfied. To know that I have no say in this any longer, that I’m truly committed to it, and can’t change my mind – even if I should momentarily want to.”

    After a pause between us, I say, “The only way I know of to ensure that I am truly experiencing this, your ownership and co-equal partial control of me, is to hope and ask that you put a chastity cage on my penis, and hide away the key where I can never ever find it. And, to ensure that there is no way I can, opps, slip out for any reason, that you would also have my penis pierced with a lockable Prince Albert piercing that goes through both my penis head and the chastity cage around it. … Committed, for real, no escaping this now that we’ve agreed together to this!” Another quiet pause between us. She slips her foot up into my lap under the table, and presses it against my penis and scrotum. Then, she says to me, “Okay. We’re going to do it, and see just how committed you really are to this. Chastity cage and piercing!”

    The adrenaline suddenly flushes through me! “Oh my Goddess! Yes, Ma’am. … I’m now committed, then!” She responds, “You’ll have to be, because I’m not going to make this easy for you!” I respond, “Yes, Ma’am. I wouldn’t want you to! I will serve you, and earn each of my erections, that you grant me, from now on. Don’t let me have one, until I do, it’s only fair!” I think she understands clearly that I will use my mouth, my tongue, my fingers, and a strap-on, even, to ensure she is getting her – now regular – orgasms through my attentive efforts upon her body. And, like I said in that post and in many not shared posts, anything and everything else household and intimate related that is necessary – and to her full satisfaction – in order to earn my randomnly granted momentary freedoms to erect and have an orgasm of my own before her. Never again, being able to play with myself and masturbate. Now actually living what I’ve always sexually fantasized about!

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